Koninginnedag!

Today is Queen's Day on Saba. It is a national holiday for Holland and the Netherlands Antilles which celebrates the Queen's birthday.

In Amsterdam, the day is HUGE with celebrations all throughout the city with parades and floats going down the canals and parties galore.

Leanna had the choice of working today and getting double time because of the holiday status or having the day off with pay. She chose to take the day off so Paul and I will be working a double shift by ourselves at Tropics.

Friends of ours are having their own "Queen's Day" party this evening with a mostly gay crowd on the island. There invitation is quoted as Dress like a Queen, Act like a Queen, Celebrate the Queen!

Hopefully we can get out of the restaurant in time to enjoy at least a part of it.

Happy Queen's Day from Saba. Koninginnedag!

The Pyramid House

There is a property on Saba that is for sale called the Pyramid House. It is located on "the Level" which is one of the highest neighborhoods on the island.

The house and guest house does absolutely NOTHING for me but the land and views are simply stunning.

The property is done in all this "Zen" Buddhist themed and inspirecd crap with gongs, meditations mazes and stuff that I simply don't understand.

It is located nearly 2,000 feet above sea level right on the edge of the cliff with views to absolutely die for.

It is sited on about 2 acres and has look outs from various cliffs and is living truly on the edge.

They are asking $1.4 Million for it which is exactly $1.395 Million above our budget.

Ahhh, just to dream for a moment.... Happy Monday from Saba....

More shit for sale

More of my life's collection is being sold today at the DC auction house. With the "booming" economy I'm sure records will be broken as the hammer falls.

NOT!

In particular is this poster by Paleologue done in the very early 1900's. I bought this when I used to live across the street from the Methodist Church and displayed is proudly in the Sun Room so all the church-goers could see it through the French Doors. I figured it was the best I could do to flaunt a bare breasted Trojan woman to them because, after all, they needed SOMETHING to pray about.



Now I have somethinng to pray about; getting it sold at reasonable price.

Loud Birds are gonna die!

We brought down our two birds with us when we moved here, a Quaker Parrot and a Princess of Whales Parakeet.

I'm not sure why, perhaps and change in sun direction as the season changes but over the last week they have starting going crazy the very minute the first peek of dawn arrvies and that is about 5:05am.

This does NOT bode well for my beauty sleep. I'm thinking of all kinds of remedies:

duct tape
birdie downers
a huge sheet to keep them in the dark
medication for Chris
recipes for various fowl stews

Happy sleepless morning from Saba......

Another new orchid bloom!

This one just bloomed and it is awesome!

This particular orchid is a native of Belize. The plant itself has tubular shaped cones that are hollow and each cone dies after the bloom. Ants live inside the cone and collect the nectar out of the bloom and bring it back. This causes a fungus to grow inside.

Legend has it the locals of Belize would take the cone and use it as a Marijuana pipe because the fungus inside is a Hallucinogenic.


Cool! Happy "stoner" day from Saba!

So I've been thinking

and I'm mad as hell.

When I decided to write this blog about my big life changing adventure I did it for myself, not anyone else. The mere fact that other people seem to enjoy it brings me happiness if I can offer a smile, a giggle or an outright belly laugh from time to time for readers. That is what brings ME joy.

I have also gone out of my way to be cautious in my writing so not to offend anyone or incriminate anyone with my stories.

Since last night's post, I have received nearly 20 emails from people telling me not to stop writing, 7 of those were from individuals who I've never met in my life!!

The recommendation was that I make by blog private so that the general public won't be able to read it without my permission. That form of censorship is simply not acceptable to me.

So I have decided that if a few, very few folks don't enjoy the blog or find it insulting, then they can just NOT read it. It's just that simple.

Fuck them, no that's really not worth the effort, UN-Fuck them. Hah!

So I will be back to my snide, cynical and sometimes campy self in no time; as soon as my blood stops boiling........

Closing up Shop.....

Unfortunately it has come to my attention that my blog has been surprising, offensive, off putting and down right insulting to a number of folks here on Saba and surrounds so I've decided that it is in my best interest that I restrict my right to free speech and opinion in this "quaint little community" and resign myself to living a quiet a "MUTE" life here on the rock. It is wise that I do so while I'm here.............





Obviously, the First Amendment doesn't mean so much here............................

Bon Voyage, I hope you enjoyed your stay, Best Wishes, and Come back Soon for more fun, humor, joy and good laughs at another time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love You,

Chris

The Results are back... He's NOT Pregnant!

So Paul and I left Saba on Thursday afternoon to prepare for our "day" at the hospital on St. Maarten to try and figure out what was wrong with him. We flew over on the last flight



and landed around 5:30pm. After renting our car and getting our map we found our way to the "luxurious" L'Esperance Hotel which was near the medical center. After seeing the (ummmn NO) matching bed linens and drapes I then realized why it was only $78 dollars per night.

Not my first choice of accomodations but the interesting thing about our health insurance now on Saba is that they PAY FOR EVERYTHING! Once the doctor on Saba ordered Paul's tests, the insurance company ensured arrangements for the flight, the hotel room, a per diem allowance for spending money for the day "away from home" and the hospital charges with NO out of pocket expenses. Wow!

We were scheduled to be at the hospital between the hours of 8am and Noon and they would take patients in turn as they arrived. We decided it was best that we arrive early and got there about 7:45am at the St. Maarten M ' dical Center.

Paul signed in and was called within 10 minutes

to have his tests done. I went off to look for coffee and something to entertain myself when Paul walked up to me and said "let's go, I'm all done". We were out of there in less than 30 minutes.

So we now know that he is officially NOT PREGNANT which kind of pissed me off. I had already imagined our travel circuit between L.A. and Chicago to be interviewed by Dr. Phil and Oprah followed by our new reality TV show and the photo shoot for the cover of People magazine.

Given Paul's age and living on Saba without all the fancy medical facilities would have most likely resulted in the need to have a natural childbirth which would have been a real pain in the ass, literally. Imagine the stretch marks?? But all that pain and discomfort would have been worth it (for me at least) with all this newfound fame and fortune!

So, alas, no fame, no fortune but a daily allowance for spending money on St. Maarten! So, what do 2 boys do with great news and a few extra dollars in your pocket?



A BLOODY MARY BREAKFAST AT KANGAROO COURT IN PHILLIPSBURG, OF COURSE!


followed by some strolling, shopping and people watching along the beach front. We even got to see a "Muffin Bottom"

In all seriousness, though, it was all good news for us down here in the Caribbean! Most likely a gall bladder attack which showed signs and symptons of things much more serious which made for multiple sleepless and "induced" nights for ME. (After all, it's all about me) For now, a diet change for Paul and we watch and wait.....

And off we go

I've been busy trying to "hold down the fort" this week at Tropic's while Paul has been out. It took several days of coordination but this afternoon we will finally go over to St. Maarten to find out what's wrong.

I keep saying it is just a case of eating too much spicy Mexican food but I'm not a doctor (I only play one on TV)

Easter Monday Blues

OK, so i now feel like a total bitch.

When we got home from Tropic's yesterday, Paul went straight to bed and I was pissed off that we didn't go to the wedding party. This morning Paul got up and said he needed to go to the hospital and left. I said "what's wrong and do you want me to go with you?" and he said no, I'm fine.

When he got home he said that the doctor has ordered him to go to St. Maarten for an MRI to determine whether he, indeed, needs his gall bladder removed. They said that's probably why he's had flu like symptons and high fever preriodically over the last several weeks and it's just escalated to a point now that it needs to be taken out.

Of course I'm feeling really crappy for acting so childish and selfish BUT am wondering what kind of specialty dishes we can make out of it for the restaurant.........."Tonight, we're offering pan sauteed Gall Bladder with a Dijon Mustard, white white cream sauce with chive potatoes and candied carrots" Yummy!!


Needless to say, Paul is lying on the couch in pain waiting for the next flight out of here and I'm medicating myself.... not with Demoral..........

Happy Easter, Ugh!

We're just getting home from serving Easter Brunch at Tropic's and I'm plain wiped out!!

We were invited to go to a friend's wedding today on Saba! The bride is actually the daughter of our friend's and we hosted the rehearsal dinner for them last night at Tropic's.

The wedding was at 2pm and, needless to say, we couldn't make it to the ceremony but promised to get there as soon as we could close down the restaurant after brunch service.

Long story short, Paul is sound asleep in bed after a grueling day at the slop stop shop and I'm just annoyed that we won't be going...........

Not quite the way I wanted to spend my celebration of the resurrection of Christ.........

Happy (I'm pissed off, angry, annoyed, menstrual, agitated and overall "not a pleasant camper today") Easter Sunday from Saba!!

Good Friday was a Great Friday!

Our day started off with enjoying a nice cup of coffee on the deck yesterday morning followed by a nice day on the boat scuba diving. We did 2 dives and I saw plenty of marine life including a Hawkbill Turtle, a spotted moray eel, a huge Queen Parrot fish, stingray and a black tip reef shark.

On the way back up we stopped by the restaurant to pick up some prep stuff for food to take to our friend's house for sunset. Paul made Cream cheese and macadamia nut stuffed apricots, portobello mushroom and sun dried tomato bruschetta and chiabatta toast and a we chilled a nice Pinot Grigio.

At 5pm, we went over to Jet's house for sunset and she "themed" our evening as the Requiem Party and played requiem pieces by Schubert, Mozart, Handl, Andrew Lloyd Weber, Sarah Brightman and more in honor of Christ's death.

A very special day and these are the ones that make me love Saba!

Scuba Bunny

Happy Holy Day from Saba. Good Friday is an important day here on Saba. With so many people honoring the day with religious activities we decided to close Tropic's for the day and go scuba diving.

We will leave in about 45 minutes to head down to the harbor for 2, possibly 3 dives and then go to a friend's house tonight for sunset by her pool.

Not a bad way to spend the day, Huh?

Cove Bay, A day at "the beach"

Mondays, our day off from the restaurant was spent going down to Cove Bay near the airport with the dogs and spending some time in the water. Cove Bay is a cool little area that offers visitors a chance to swim. Not an easy feat on an island where there are no beaches.

Baxter actually ran into the water and then just stood there looking around like "What the hell did I just do?"

We've decided that our dogs are just NOT water dogs.

Back at home now, cleaned up and ready to go and have dinner with some friends at their home in Hells Gate (that's a neighborhood on the island)

Happy Holy Week from Saba.

Our Easter Sunday Parade

Now that we're within a week of celebrating Easter Sunday, Paul and I are busy getting prepared for the Sunday Brunch at Tropic's Cafe. Paul is busy putting together a special Easter feast complete with the traditional favorites and well as some themed menu items.

In the meantime, I am working hard on getting the Easter Egg Hunt ready for the kids and drunken adult participants who want to join in.

I was thinking that it would be festive to dress up in an Easter Bunny costume for the event but decided it would be too hot in this weather so I found something a little less constricting for it.

I only hope I don't scare the poor children away.

And More Blooms!

Another orchid started to bloom overnight. I'm so excited.

This one is WAAYYY out on the far edge of the cliff so I had to use Paul's fancy pants camera with the zoom lense to get the shot.

I'm not sure what variety it is but it has multiple, tiny little flowers in bright orange.

Happy Palm Sunday from Saba.

Cattleya Orchids

When we moved up to the house on Booby Hill, Paul wanted to get some orchids to have around the yard. With a perfect amount of shade and moisture in the air, the location is perfect for them to thrive.

Well the first one has bloomed. Here it is with the morning mist in the background.

Paul tied it into the "V' of the tree on the edge of the cliff and it seems pretty darn happy there.

Happy Saturday from Saba!

Ah, Love is in the Air!

We were wrapping up our lunch shift at the restaurant today and found these 2 Saban Anoles getting a little frisky on the fence.

The name Anole (Actually Anoli) comes from the African word which means "Little Devil". Well, these little devils were putting on quite a spectacle.

WAIT A MINUTE!!!!

Saban Anoles are solid grey in color for the female and tan and dark spotted for the male. These two are both solid gray. Well, I'll be...........

I always knew that Saba was Gay Friendly but this is ridiculous.

Lesbian Lizard Lovers on Saba!! That's definitely one for the record books.

Happy licky licky Lesbian Lizard style from Saba..........

I Know You All are So Jealous....

of my glamorous life in the Caribbean with cliffside villas overlooking the sea and mega yachts sailing by with the jet set crowd enjoying their winter vacations all around.

So I thought I'd give you a little inside peak into a day in the life of Chris Fries:

#1- get some more minutes placed on my island Chippie pre paid phone


#2 - Have 2 new tires installed on our "island Lexus" the Diahatsu Terios


#3- Burn my homemade Peach Cheesecake because the damn oven isn't calibrated and runs too hot now that it's been "fixed"


#4- Throw my back out carrying garbage to the back alley and then medicate myself with a muscle relaxer and pass out in bed.

Happy Friday from Saba.

Peyton Place, Island Style

Maybe I should write a novel loosely based on Peyton Place about Saba.

I can star as Constance MacKenzie who returns "home" to Saban Place from the big city and becomes a lonely and repressed individual. Of course I would be without an illegitimate child.

I'm just NOT that "social" anymore!

Happy lonely and homesick day from Saba today....

World Wide Web Down! Help!!

At some point during my beauty sleep last night the communications tower here on Saba had a malfunction and we lost our internet access.

I felt helpless and stranded not having an outside link to the world. And, yes I freaked out for a little bit.


All is better now that it is working again and I'm much calmer. Oh shit, I just spilled my cool refreshing adult beverage on the laptop. There goes the stress level syward again.


M*%TH$R FU*&ER!!!